I'd just like to say I used to feel sorry for Mc Cain, not only because he's so pale and his teeth are so yellow, but because he was a prisoner of war as well.  But now that he's chosen that, that girl, who keeps a dead bear on her sofa, as his running mate, I actually want to pull his hair.  And I know this sounds paranoid, but I think they like each other.  I'm not kidding.  Did you see that clip where he gives her a little hug and then he turns his head and closes his eyes as though he's still smelling her perfume? Cause I did.  And I hope they get caught having sex in some dirty hunting lodge bathroom in Alaska (but they're children never find out, because that would be horrible) and she's forced to give up her stupid job  so she has to go home and actually spend time with her eight billion kids instead of pretending to be a mother while she's off shooting polar bears, firing her sister's ex-husbands, and forcing women to get pregnant. 

Having said that I'd also like to mention that I have a new TURBOLASH vibrating mascara that I highly recommend to women all over America.  It's by Estee Lauder.  You should see my eyelashes.